Success in love is… Part 21

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5  Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20

I turned to see her looking at me. Our eyes met each other and the blurring vision from the tears weren’t good enough to deter our sight. Everyone rushed by her side. She tried to smile at them and looked me as I walked to the bed and stood near her feet. I was feeling weak and kept my hands on the beds edges, bending down. She tried to get up and showed a concerned look which made us exchange smiles. I don’t remember exactly but it should be my cousin sister who signaled everyone to move out. She smiled as she passed me and gave a quick kiss on my cheeks saying, ‘I love her’.

I sat next to her and she said, “Finally” for which I smiled and replied the same. She wanted to sit up and with the help of the nurse we folded the bed to a slanting position so that she can sit leaning on it. She tried to raise her right hand that had the cathetar but couldn’t. She then kept her left hand on my right cheek and said “I guess I have never seen you with a beard. I used to look like a Gillette model back in college. Always clean shaven.”

“Ha! Those were days I could do a weekly shave and yet maintain the look.” I started to explain but she had that mischievous smile back from college days. I stopped halfway in realization that she is indeed making fun of me. I pinched her nose and said, “You creep!”

She smiled and kissed on my hand. “How long have I waited for a day when everyone will accept our love? Now I don’t want anything more.” she rested her cheek in my hand and closed her eyes as she spoke.

“Actually there are lots you should do now. I want you pursue your dreams and make it big in your passions.” I said in a firm tone, moving my other hand to her free cheek, to hold my life in my hands.

“Ya! Now that I have achieved my first and foremost dream, I have time for the other dreams. But it’s actually tough to realize what I want more from life.” She said and turned to her right.

“Hey! You wanted to be a designer. What about the Interior decorations? Come on. Don’t say you don’t want them now.” I removed my hands, took her right hand that had the Cathetar and caressed it.

“It’s not like that. They were my dreams, dreams that you nurtured. Dreams that I never had when took up Fashion Technology. Dreams I realized could be possible only after meeting you.” She said without looking at me.

I turned her head to face me and said “Please dear. I want you to be free of the strings. I can never live with a puppet just because I love it. And by all means am dumb when it comes to handling puppets.”

“So this puppet is finally free. But don’t leave the doll as such before it learns to walk on its own. Just be there round the corner. If at all, I am falling down, I should fall in your hands. So dear…” She paused for a moment, made herself look serious and said, “I too can say things with metaphors,” with a twinkle in her eyes.

“Hey! You are a strong self confident woman who should have dreams and destinies of your own.” I started reiterating my stand in a more serious tone.

“Oh! Just stop.” She said and pulled me close and hugged me. “See I always wanted to feel two hearts beating for me on either side of my chest like this. I don’t want to wait any longer. Let’s marry as soon as possible. I promise to become a dominant, super achieving wife and torture you all life.” She bit my ear as she said the last words.

I smiled, hugged her close and said, “Oh! Don’t hurry up. We haven’t really enjoyed the careless love life anytime. Let’s have that first and marry later. There are too many places to roam around and celebrate in Bangalore.”

“Well nothing can beat the Chennai Beach which has shared all my tears and thoughts. Those evenings I spent watching the relentless attempts of the ocean to hug the land irrespective of the failures, that night when I got back all my strength after reaching the brink of giving up when I saw the Moon drive away the darkness and appear from behind the dark clouds, those moonless nights that make me feel that horizon has finally become a realty with the ocean and sky having the same inseparable color are cherished inside me to share with you. But all those times were necessary to realize how strong I am. But not anymore, dear, I don’t want any of those days again.

“There are lots we are yet to explore inside ourselves. Let’s visit all the places that shared our loneliness and sorrows. Let’s party and make up for the lost time. Marriage can happen anytime.” I said and kissed her ear.

“You speak as if you are taking a warm up session before a big match. Anyways I too want to have a worry free, commitment free life for some time. And it’s important that we share our memories, tears, smiles from lost times before we tie the knot.” She was spoiling my hair style, “Anything is fine as long as I am with you” she said with a tear falling on my neck.

“So when are you coming to Bangalore?” I asked.

“Soon! But come to Chennai for a week and share my sea, first.” She smiled.

“Sure.” I said and came out of the embrace as our parents came in.

We had a good time discussing various things as we had one big family inside the small room and she was discharged that evening. Any ailment, let alone dehydration, can’t be any serious when there are too many people to love and take care of you.

As we were about to leave, her Dad called out loud for his driver who arrived in a second and stood next to him. Her dad looked at him and as if a sudden thought crossed his mind, held his hand, “Sorry bro, I have never respected you. Though you are elder to me, I have never thought you as an equal because of this caste stupidity. Sorry for everything.”

The Driver looked confused. He has never seen anything like this all his life. He smiled finally, “Yes Sir, Your daughter has taught this to me when she was a small kid” and smiled at her as we walked out. “But I have never seen anyone else as old as you say what you have said and to someone working for him.”

“Yes. We lose many good qualities as we grow up. But we also get opportunities to realize our mistakes.” Her dad said and hugged him.

“I know your daughter is studying in Vellore. What is she studying?” he asked still in the embrace.

“She is studying in the Government College to become a doctor sir.” The driver said with pride in his face.

“Great! She is a good student. She will be a great doctor. But how are you managing the expenses? I never realized that I should increase the salary as years go by.”

“She is studying in Bank Loan that she had got on her own.”

“Great! The young lads are well informed nowadays and are standing on their own legs from a very young age. I am very happy for you.”

They walked to the car, hand in hand and were discussing other things about each other’s families more like long time friends than a master and servant. The seed for change has been sown and it will shake the foundation of the caste system prevalent within her family and may be the whole village.

My parents and her parents had agreed to have our marriage a year later. My cousins hugged me and her from all sides before they left and made her promise to join them in all their outings in Chennai. She received a lot of hugs and kisses from my relatives and her parents were making sure the balance is maintained.

She had booked her tickets to go back to Chennai the same day and we had a nice discussion at the railway station with the intern. They were getting close to each other and pulling my leg now and then till the Nilgiris Express arrived. She got in and signaled the intern to get a water bottle. As she left to buy one, she pulled me by my shirt and said, “She is very pretty. If at all I hear anything about you flirting with her, I will kill you.”

“Is it? Actually I never felt she is pretty before. One minute.” I turned to see the intern, who smiled at me, unaware of our conversation and I smiled back.

She tightened her grasp and pulled me saying, “I was just kidding. I love you and this won’t change for anything. Even if you had had hundred girlfriends my love won’t change. It’s my heart that determines my love and not yours.”

“Well you have underestimated me dear. The count is much higher. But any girl I meet reminds any of your actions. So even if I have thousand girlfriends, I would have only admired your qualities in them.”

We remained in that position amidst the comments passed in the coach until the intern came near and gave a pat in my shoulder. “Guys! There are people watching you. Enough romancing or else the window panes will break.” The Intern said in a mischievous tone and everyone in her coach smiled. I watched the train leave till it disappeared into darkness unaware of the big changes that are waiting for me.

Success in love is… Part 20

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5  Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19

She was lying on the only bed that the small Dispensary had. The nurse made an intra-venous access with a cathetar which was inserted into a peripheral vein in her right hand. My heart skipped a beat when I saw the swift puncture and was angry with the Nurse for doing it in a hurry. She then hung a transparent liquid in the drip chamber with ease that it dropped few initial drops in quick succession which she adjusted. Her Dad took a step near her,

"Can't you do it with care?"

The nurse looked puzzled. She didn't say anything till she adjusted the arrangement.

"I know what I am doing."

Her Dad didn't speak anything, hung his head and stood next to the bed. My Uncle stopped the Nurse and asked her about the patient's health and she explained everything she knew with patience.

Finally she said, "We have many years of experience and I know how to handle these things. Anyways I don't think any of you had cared about the girl's well being."

She shook her head as a sign of resentment and left the room.

The whole lot looked ashamed at each other and my Uncle conveyed that she is getting an Intra venous shot to overcome electrolyte imbalance and the blood tests are being done. I went near her and wiped away the saliva that had spelled from her mouth and sat next to her. The plastic Canulla and the small red spot in it signifying blood drawn out were sending chills and I held the fingers in that hand. She was unconscious, but the slight warmth the fingers had, sent comforting waves through my cold hands. I was looking at the tiny scar that her right thumb has. The scar had become the reminder of my birthday in second year of college. She brought a cake right to our department library and burnt her thumb when she tried lighting all the candles with a single match stick. I looked up to see her hair flying over her face inviting me to hold them and make them fall in the bunch.

I moved closer and kept my right hand on her right cheek much to gain back my composure than to comfort her. Loving her wasn’t tough. How often have we abstained from loving someone who has shown us how to live? But why did she go through all these troubles for me? Why should she risk her life? Life would have been much better without all these longings and sufferings if we had gone in our own ways. Well, we don’t have a choice in all encounters; we have to love the one who has it in them to break our comfort zones no matter how hard it is. After all, reasoning and rational analysis fails only in love. "Love happens" as much certainly as "Life goes on"

I was losing the idea of where I am now. I could see her sleeping in my hands and nothing else mattered.

I turned to see someone standing next to me when he kept his hand on my shoulder. It took a moment to realize the person.

"So. You are the one who stopped my marriage."

He had a wide smile for which I gave back an indifferent look.

"Hey, I was just kidding. She loves you more than she loves herself."

"I know." I said and a tear dropped from my eyes which I didn't allow to roll on my cheeks.

"Oh guys. Sorry. I forgot that I haven't told anything about her condition. She was completely out of danger. Actually she never was in one. She just had symptoms of Dehydration when we brought her here. Oral rehydration could not be given as she was unconscious and we arranged for Intra venous rehydration."

I was relieved a bit. "But Dehydration can't be this serious" the right brain was active again.

"It won't be. But she hasn't taken any food or fluids for at least 2 days. Increased stress and the smoke should have made the situation worse." the doctor said this as he came near to check if the Drip is set in the right gauge. He then turned to her parents, "How on earth can you guys leave her to this state when she is at home?"

They didn't speak a word. Her mother reached my mother’s shoulders whom my mom hugged.

"It's all because of me. I never understood the value of people. For me the rules that the past showed were indispensible and always thought what will happen in future if those were not followed. I never understood that am not living the present because of it. I never understood everyone here can make you feel small by loving you more than what you deserve." Her Dad said facing the ground.

My Uncle held his hand, "Better late than never." He said and gave a hug, may be as a welcome to rational world from myths and stupidity. I was watching them break free from centuries old barrier created to divide people. Just then my cousin signaled all of us to move out of the small room and wait outside. Everyone moved out without asking me to come out. I saw her lying, eyes shut and a small bend in her lips occurred as I touched her chin.  We remained so for a few minutes.

"Come. Let’s discuss how we can arrange their marriage." I heard her Dad ask.

"Yes. There is no reason to wait any longer. We shall fix the date as soon as she gets well." My Dad replied with a smile.

"It should be as grand as possible; I now have many people to invite. For all these years I have not respected the people who have worked for me and with me in the name of caste. From now on they are as important to me as anyone else and I should call everyone."

"Yes, that will be a perfect. But let marriage be a simple one, we don’t have to spend on the unnecessary grandiose."

"Hmmm. We can discuss about it. I want this to be the best wedding I have ever seen."

I heard them go about discussing the marriage arrangements in detail and went out to tell them something I had in mind. I know they won’t like what I am going to tell but that is important.

"I don’t want this marriage now." I said looking at them who exchanged puzzled looks as they heard me.

"Why? Who is stopping you?" my Dad asked with a firm face.

"There has been a long break. We have to catch up with lots of things. We have to find out if our common interests and differences are still the same. I don’t want to end up like all those failed love marriages which end in a divorce or become a namesake union for the family." I leaned on the scribbled wall and was looking up at the heavy metal fan from the past century rotating slowly.

"Do you really want this? She will do anything for you." Her mother looked concerned and confident.

"That’s exactly what I don’t want her to do. I have been a reason for her to realize her wings. Now I don’t want to cripple them. Let her fly high with freedom and find her own sky. If that sky lies above my land, then we shall remain together lifelong making horizon as realty." I gave a quick smile and turned to see her lying on the bed still unconscious.

"Oh come on. You guys can never dislike each other." The intern came near and held my hand and said in a pleading tone.

"Yes! We can’t. Instead we will start locking our dreams and pretend to be happy, thinking it as a sacrifice. These sacrifices will then form the symbols of our love. I don’t want this; as any symbol for love should be love itself not an act that made us, refrain from doing what we love."

"Why are you doing this?" my aunt came near and asked me, pulling my head down and looking at my eyes.

"My life has never been predictable. I don’t want to take chances now. Look at her, she wanted to become a Designer, an Interior decoration expert but has become a software engineer. She had dreams and was living a life filled with happiness till I met her. She gave that life to me and has lived in solitude all these days to make herself independent. She has to gain back her dreams and start living a life that she loves."

"Why can’t those happen after your marriage?" my mom asked.

"Marriage is a bigger commitment; it has its own demands. I want her back not because I love her but because she alone can show me the meaning of my life. But before that she has to become that someone she was in college, she has to make herself dig out all those ambitions she had buried for me. She can’t do that when I am around. She can’t take risks when she has a dependant."

The nurse came out from her room and said

"What kind of people are you? First you let a girl become ill of starvation, then you bring her here unconscious and now when she has regained her conscious, no one is near her"