Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5 Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12
I wiped away the tiny tears that were trying to join together to roll down and opened the letter. It was not her handwriting, it was mine. It was something that I had written for her in second year, when she asked me to define the girl of my dreams.
I want a girl who is an equal
Enjoys life for there is no sequel
Energies and Effervescence filled in her bone
Loves and lives for a mind of her own
Decides her destinies; Determines her stand
Shares all available seconds like DNA strand
Spiraled, bonding, contradicting and dictating
Giving birth to a new me after each separating
I want a girl who believes everything said above is her own right
Knows I own the same set for she is no goddess and me no saint
Mocks every custom that beholds and belittles based on birth
Holds my hand and leads me if I hesitate amidst raging wrath
Laughs at the love myth of two body and single soul
Loves my concept of bonded rods on which rails roll
Running parallel as equals, holding hands, waiting for station
To overlap with passion and create a family of fusion
Takes the initiative in adopting our first girl child
Teaches her, the only God true is her mother of blood
For how many Gods risk their life for our birth
Who gives us elixir, unbiased, unlike the gods of myth
I want a girl who is proud of her sex
Knows my pride is neither an ounce more nor less
I want a girl who is an equal
For one life is all we got, there is no sequel
“I tried hard to be the girl you wanted but I can’t anymore. My struggle has come to an end and I have accepted defeat. My parents are important to me as much as you are. And I am accepting to this marriage to make minimal damage to my close ones. Hope you understand my stand and move on. Please come for the marriage, I might cry when I see you but I can’t take this step without your approval. I want you to know that I tried till the last minute, but failed. Hope this society changes in the coming years and no one else suffers as we had suffered. Please move on. I am very sorry.” She had written.
I kept the letter on the table nearby and closed my eyes which showed her cry in a red bridal saree. I cursed the whole caste system and thought about the numerous hearts it has broken. I came out to see the dark clouds ready to send showers. The intern came near, held my hand and looked at me like someone who would cry any moment. I smiled a weak smile and patted her in hopes of conveying that everything is alright. I went in, sat on the table and opened the draw to see the only photo we took together, which showed some tear drops as soon as it was taken out.
The world was blank for a few minutes/hours/seconds. I was startled when someone patted me on my shoulder and the intern was standing beside me, wiping her tears. She showed my mobile phone on the table which was ringing. She held my shoulder saying, “Be strong. Never lose hope” and walked away. “What hope is left for me to hold or lose?”I thought as I attended the call.
My Aunt was on the other end and she informed that she has got a wedding invitation from Erode. I jumped up and asked for her name and the answer was positive. My mom called and informed that all my close relatives have received invitations.
My brother called me and asked if we can storm into their house and bring her here. He was so agitated that he just needed a yes from me to do that the next moment. After all he has friends in every part of this state because of his social activities. I declined the idea and said she has made a decision and certainly would have thought about this option. But for some reason has decide it won’t be the right thing to do.
He then made a conference call to all close relatives and my uncle was very angry that her dad has tried to show his caste pride by sending invite to everyone in our family and wanted to teach him a lesson. He even suggested that his friend is a Police commissioner in Coimbatore and will do any help he asks for. “We can complain that the marriage is done against the girl’s will” he said. But I said she has written a note to me that she has given up her fight and finally accepting the marriage.
Mom asked me what else has she written and read the letter loud for them. Mom was moved and said she is such a nice girl. But my aunt was angry with her for giving up. The other cousins who spoke were supporting my brother’s stand to bring her here and marrying her to me.
Finally my dad spoke, “We should know that she is strong girl and has taken a decision about her life. We should respect that but at the same time we should teach her dad a lesson by making him realize that we are better than him and his caste pride is nothing compared to love.”
Everyone else were silent to hear what he going to say next, “We should all go to the marriage and wish the girl all success in her life. Make her dad realize that by rejecting her love he has denied a great alliance for his daughter. He should know that we respect his daughter’s decision more than him. She should know that even after this she has our blessings and love. She should lead her life without guilt.”
As always my Dad’s decision is final in our family and everyone agreed without second thoughts. They started discussing about the saree they are going to wear and gifts they are going to get for her. Dad asked me to come home a day before the wedding, so that we can leave from here together.
I opened the card again to see the Date and it was on Sunday which meant I have 5days to make up my mind. I washed my face and came to bed. Mobile showed it was 11.30PM, I tried to sleep but I couldn’t take her out of mind. “How can you quit? How can you ever live without me?” I was worried for her. All I want now is to know that her groom treats her well. Hope he understands her and she adapts to the never imagined situation. She isn’t someone who can give up on love. She was all over my retina. Eyes closed or open, she was to be seen.
The door opened suddenly and the intern came in with a parcel.
“Please eat this.”
“No! I am fine. I don’t need anything.”
“Please. Will she be happy if you are in this state.” she said looking at the photo in my hand.
I didn’t answer that. I know she won’t be. I know she will be wishing same for me. A happy life. I don’t know if it’s possible.
“Please eat. I am leaving now. Prof wants to meet us at 10 tomorrow”
She left soon after saying that. I took out the parcel which had a sandwich, which she should have made herself as the cafeteria closes by 10. I had a bite and thought, “Why would Prof want to meet me? Has she told him? I don’t want him or anyone else to know this. I can’t live a life of sympathy in my workplace.”
I reached my Prof’s office at 9.45 to make sure that the meeting is not about me. But he asked me to stay in lab and not to enter his office before 10. My lab-mates came by 9.55 and Prof called us in at 10.
“So how are you guys?”
“Fine” we said with ambiguity filled among us.
“Do you remember what you did 6 months before?” he asked us.
6 months back I was went my college convocation where I saw her last, my friend had his accident. But why is he asking this now?
“Come on man. 6 months back.”
“Nope! I don’t remember. Why?”
“6 month back you did something that has brought great credits to this lab and me.”
I was totally lost. All I could remember was about the convocation, the time when she has given another invitation.
“The paper you guys did, is published today in Nature and here check this” he showed the paper in his laptop.
My friend hugged me and the intern was shaking our hands very firm and showing great excitement. I saw our paper in the journal with my friend as the correspondence author, my name next and my Prof's name at the last. He has edited that part and made us get all the credits. To any researcher, a paper published in Nature is something like winning an Olympic gold or an Oscar. To me and my friend, it was like getting one in our debut. I smiled with them for the success and inside me I laughed at the unpredictable life I have.
Prof asked me to start working on my thesis for PhD under his guidance. Well, as always life has pushed me from the top of the cliff and kicked me back to top when I was about to collapse on the ground. All I could do now was to have a weak smile and carry it wherever I went in the Campus as everyone started identifying me.
Before I realized it was Friday and I started from lab in thoughts of catching the 10.30 bus. But when I was near the gate, the intern came and stopped me. She had walked fast and was gasping for breath. She couldn't talk but held my hand and dragged me, I didn’t know where.
poetic !!!!
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