Success in love is… Part 25

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5  Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11,Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20, Part 21, Part 22, Part 23, Part 24

I held her hand and she turned to see me. The eyes that were hiding the tears smiled and a micro nod conveyed she is fine. She extended her free hand to the intern who looked at us with guilt. She continued before I could ask anything:

“Yes! I love you. But that doesn’t mean I want to marry or live with you. You gave me the much needed hope, when I said about my past love to you. The burnt I had in my heart which I didn’t want to visit and heal, vanished all of a sudden when I saw your eyes glow up in appreciation after hearing me say I didn’t pursue the relationship. I haven’t seen anyone who had such a reaction; it was either sympathy or anger. You are someone whom I won’t be remembering as a friend but as someone who had made it to my heart like my Mom and Dad.”
She gave a pause and wiped off her tears. “I started living without any regret in heart. Life became pleasant after a long time.”
Her dad kept his hand on her shoulder and wipe off the remaining wetness from her face. He looked worried.

She came forward and caught the drop which fell off my love’s chin and they smiled forcing a few more fall. They hugged each other and she said, “I was worried when you said you love him. Seeing your tears, I thought I have made another person feel bad.”
“Another person feel bad! What? You have made everyone feel great when they finally understood you.” The Intern spoke like she had known her for ages.
“And these tears did not come because of him but because I realized my Dad is the same person who would find all my worries before I tell them to him. I have been longing for his love all these days as he doesn’t show them unless necessary.”
“Love you Dad. Thanks for showing me that you are the same person.”
He smiled and she hugged him. He kissed her forehead and turned to see us and smiled.

My Roommate came exactly when we were back to normal and the intern introduced him to her Dad and started reciting few funny moments we shared in lab. The whole atmosphere of the cafeteria changed once again and the air was filled with happiness.
My love who was watching us and walked to the Balcony. After a few minutes, I went near and hugged her from behind. Her tears spread equally on our chins. I made her turn and she wiped them off from our faces.
“I want to marry you” I said with wetness spreading inside my eyes.
“Why are you asking this now?” she asked with the stress on the last word.
“I want the whole world to know that you are my everything and I belong here” I said and pointed to her.
“Is marriage necessary for that?” she was not meeting my eyes.
“No. But something inside me tells that we should tie the knot soon. So that I can kiss you whenever I want and you can hit me as you wish.”
“As if they don’t happen now.”
“Oh! Come on dear. Why are you doing this?” I kept my hands on her shoulder and searched for mischief in her eyes. But they showed something else, they showed pain.

But I couldn’t understand what was bothering her. I lifted her face and asked her with a tear rolling down, “Don’t you want to marry me soon?”
“Of Course I do. I wake up every day in hopes that you would say this to me. But why today? Do you think I am hurt from what she said? Are you doing this out of guilt?” she asked with new tears flowing faster than the older ones.
“No dear. I was certainly worried when she said about love but I also knew you are mature enough to handle this. In fact I already had spoke to your dad two days back and said marriage in 2-3 months is fine for me. I can’t say No to him this time.” I spoke in a hurry to put her tear glands to rest, “You were very busy the past two days, so I couldn’t tell this to you.”

“You spoke to my dad? And accepted?” She asked in suspicion and surprise.
“Yes. I had called him to know a few places around Coimbatore for a friend and we spoke. May be the tone he spoke with and the fact that he was hospitalized, made me accept it. But I have been feeling great since I said Yes.” I said and suddenly realized that I should not have said what I said.
“Hospitalized?!!! Why? What happened to him?” she asked holding my collars with her eyes searching deep into mine.
“He had High BP and was admitted to make a few checks. He is fine now.”
“BP! You didn’t ask anything else.” I could see her get worried and kept my hand on her shoulder.

She pushed it down and made a call on her cell and went to the other end of the Balcony. She became restless as the calls went unattended. I went near her, “He is alright dear. I spoke to him and he himself said he is fine.”
“Of course. He will say only that. I can’t imagine why you didn’t tell me. I know it will take time for you guys to get close for what he did to us but I didn’t expect you to be this careless.”
“It’s not like that dear. He is alright.” I said with half the confidence I had went I said that first.
Just then she received a call and went a few feet away. Instant drops fell down without forming channels on her chin. She shouted, cried, plead on the phone while I watched in anticipation that everything is normal. Your confidence shatters when your loved one is in tears. You try to pin the sun and moon together to make things normal again. But here I can’t do anything. I visualized the call I had with her dad. He certainly sounded weak but also confident and her mom who spoke next discussed things about marriage and didn’t say anything about him. But looking at my love’s tears I couldn’t be sure. My patience was reaching its threshold when she finally kept the call. For a moment she wiped off the tears and looked at me. I took a step and she took two. She came near grabbed my shirt, pulled me close and said

“For the past two days I have been feeling like I have come a long distance away from my Dad. Now, when she spoke about her Dad being the same, I can’t stop myself from holding the tears. That’s why I came out. He has been there for me all my life but now he is down ill and I stand here few hundred kilometers away from him, unaware of what I should do. You could have told me. Nothing that kept me busy these days would have meant more than his good health.” She said and took her hand from my shirt. She continued in between her sobs, “I don’t know if it’s your fault of not being responsible enough, my mother’s fault of not informing me or my own fault of not calling him frequently, but I feel low inside my heart.”

A few seconds of absolute silence prevailed when she shed the remaining tears and I stood there watching the person for whose happiness I would go to the ends of the world, cry in pain. My roommate’s voice echoed from the café and ordered us to come in. She smiled, wiped of the tears and the sadness from her face and walked in. I stood there not knowing what to do.
I called her dad and it was answered by her Mom.
“What happened to Uncle?” I asked, which was the first time, I had called him so.
“He was travelling in his car and a kid suddenly came before the car from his house. The Driver stopped the car in time but Uncle had become tensed and rushed out see the kid, if he is fine. After making sure the kid is fine, he got into the car. The driver said, uncle’s hands were trembling and he fainted in sometime. Driver took him to the hospital nearby. The doctors said he was having High BP and made him stay there for a day to take tests. He is absolutely fine now.”
“Can I speak with him?” I asked.
“He has gone out without cell phone as usual. Is there anything I can tell him?”
“Nothing. I will call him later.”
“Okay. Take care.”

I walked into the café. The gang had made plans for dinner and the Intern’s dad wanted to take us to Oberoi where he was staying. I stood there unsure if I should go with them? Will she want to be alone? Are we going to Erode? But she joined the intern in making everyone come. I stood there wondering how she had masked everything that’s inside. The Intern’s dad came and put his arm over my shoulder.
“What happened sir? You seem to be lost.”
“Nothing sir” and said with enough masking to convince him that I am normal.
“Thanks for everything. My girl is really happy here. It’s long since I had seen her like this.”
“Please don’t thank me. I haven’t done anything.”
“Sometimes you don’t have to do anything. Just your presence, a missed call, a micro smile makes a huge impact in the person who loves you.” He said seeing his daughter.
“It sure does.” I said looking at my love.
“Life is just about being there for our loved ones when they need us. I realized that because of you. I thought children don’t stay the same loving apple pies when they turn into adults and move away. But they have the same problem as their parents do. We keep an Everest of love covered inside our heart until it dawns on us to shed the snow and let the love see light. After all, every child and parent long for the child’s childhood days. But we forget that the lovely past can just repeat itself if we open up our hearts.”

He said and took a few steps to meet our Professor, who had been refusing the intern’s plea and held his hand asking, “Please come. The family is never complete without the head.” 
Everyone stopped speaking and watched as the Professor took a few seconds to say, “Yes. I will be ready in 15mins.”
The Oberoi was spectacular as it should be and we had nice time. We were the last few people to come out of the restaurant after the usual crowd started getting irritated with our high decibel chats and laughs. I was dropped at my love’s place, as no one was driving back to the Campus.

We entered the home and again I could witness the super clean house with all things kept where they should be. I sat down to watch songs in Television while she changed and came near me. She stood near and watched the song for a moment and went to the bedroom. I went in next and asked, “Are you okay?”
“No, I am not.”
“Sorry. I thought it’s not a big issue.”
“It’s not a big issue.”
“It’s not like that dear. I care about him.”
“I am angry with myself and not with you. Don’t worry. I will be normal when I wake up. Switch off the lights except the night lamp when you come to sleep.”
“Come?” I said within my mouth.
“Yes. It’s a new house. You will catch cold if you don’t sleep on the bed. You can hug me if you still feel colder.”
I smiled when she finished saying all this like she was reading the news headline in the national television.

Success in love is… Part 24

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5  Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11,Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20, Part 21, Part 22, Part 23

“Hello”

“Yes. So you are my daughter’s mentor in lab?”
“Menter! Nope we a fellow researchers under the same Professor.”
“Whatever. She says you have been a great person to be with and intends to spoil her future in your lab.”
“Spoil her future? Our lab is one of the very few labs in India which are comparable to labs in top institutions worldwide. I can’t comment about your decisions and your daughter’s future but our lab is the best.”
“Ha! Smart answer. I really don’t understand why would anyone forgo a life in the States for a lab like yours. I presume your Prof won’t be offering her a PhD now.”
“Ya! He has his own standards but your daughter is smart, she can start her PhD in a year.”
“You don’t have to tell how smart my daughter is. I know her more. I haven’t said no for any of her desires but now she is asking something that is far too sub-standard from what I had imagined.”
I kept quiet, not sure whom or what he is referring as sub-standard. I mean “Far too Sub-standard”

“By the way, Are you a Hindu? I can’t make out from your name. Nowadays people have started keeping these neutral names, names that can belong to more than one faith.”
“A Social Humanist”
“A What?”
“Nothing Sir. I don’t think my religion is of any significance in deciding your daughter’s career.”
“I wish it isn’t.” He paused for a moment, cleared his throat and continued, “Anyway I will be coming there to have a look and take the final decision. I will let you know when I come.”
“Sure. But before you do that please ask her to mail my Prof regarding your visit.”
“Whatever.”

He kept the phone and I stood looking at my lab from the cafeteria. “A sub-standard place” according to her Dad is assumed to be the best in the country. I had a smile thinking about the Indian parent’s obsession with foreign countries in the west. A son/daughter settled abroad who leads a dog’s life there is assumed to be a well-settled and happy chap compared to a person having a comfortable and happy life here.
I had a discussion with my Prof about the intern and he promised that he will consider her if she intends to join our team again. He also cautioned that the projects need someone who is committed to research and not the laboratory or to fellow researchers. “You can’t become emotionally attached to your workplace or colleagues, in a research set up.” He mentioned at last sounding like a Nerd which we all are, in a way or the other.

My happiness came by train on the next Friday. She had asked me to wait outside her coach and I did as instructed. For the first time I was on time and the train was late. I sat on a chair and closed my eyes which were burning from lack of sleep. Last two days weren’t easy for me. The success in research meant we have to repeat our studies a numerous times to be sure. I had to set up all the arrangements for the next round of experiments. The entire family had called me asking about her arrival, place of stay, Nature of the job, and lot of other things about her for which I didn’t have any answer. Doing justice to the kind of person I have grown into, I haven’t asked her any such details. Aren’t they her decisions? Why is everyone asking me and getting upset when I say I don’t know? She has control of her life and as independent as she can get. Sometimes if we stand away and see our loved ones handle life’s problems on their own, we have a high risk of being looked upon as less caring, and insensitive. But unless they face the wind how are they going to learn to sail? I spoke philosophy with family but inside my heart I felt I haven’t cared enough.

A whistle followed by the classic train sound woke me up and I stood up and moved to the edge of the platform almost involuntarily. I turned either side and couldn’t find any train. I abstained from the idea of jumping down to the rails and check out the metal rods with my ears. I turned to see the people around and no one gave any signs of the train’s arrival. Before I could start to analyze, the Satabadi express passed on the opposite platform towards Chennai. I smiled and came back to my seat. For a moment I didn’t have anything to think about, except for her. If she had been here, she would have laughed her hearts out, hugged me and I would have said “This didn’t happen”in her ears. She would have bargained for a few chocolates and a animation movie which we would have watched already. As always I would have acted as if it was a tough task and agreed at last. She would have said “You are so so loveable.” Though we very well know that I would go anywhere in this world and beyond, if she holds my hand and talks to my ears, we would do all this drama, again and again.

Now the whistle and classic train sound was accompanied with panic in the platform. I stood up and walked to the S9 coach’s door. She jumped from the train before it stopped and ran a few steps to jump on to my chest, planting a kiss on my cheeks. Before I could realize, I have made every single person in the Bangalore cantonment Platform envy me. She didn’t showed any signs of getting down even after a hundred eyes passed watching us.
“Shall we get your luggage.”
“Nope. I don’t have any. I had sent everything through movers and packers.”
“Wow! I didn’t expect that. Shall I keep my luggage down?”
“Nope. I am not going to allow you do that. Just hold me for some more time, till I gain back the spirit to kick you for what you just said.”
“Come on yaar. There are people around us.”
“So what? Am I stopping them from hugging their lovers?

She bit my ear after saying this and jumped down to run before I hit her. I didn’t chase her but stood there looking at my life get backs its colors. She came back to me and I held her face in my hands. She closed her eyes as the cold hands sent chills and I kissed her forehead saying “I love you”

She informed about her place of stay which was close to my lab, closer to my lab mates house and far from her office. She took me to the flat and we spent the rest to the day receiving her luggage, unpacking and arranging it. After the basic arrangements were over, I headed to the bath in order to make sure, I don’t get cold from dust allergy. I came out to find a dusted, wiped house filled with the pleasant agarbathi smoke. She came out of the kitchen with a cup of tea and gave it to me. I felt like I have a family already.

Days passed with her getting busy with work and we kept ourselves together as much as we can. One such evening she called to say that she is on the way to my Lab and we promised to have dinner together. As I walked out to make a reservation in the nearby restaurant, I saw her coming in. She had a dull look and her smile wasn’t the one that brings smile in me. Her Dad walked beside her and looked very much like a big businessman in her suit and Blackberry. The intern gave a hug and I shook hands with her dad. She informed that they have met the Prof and he had asked her to join as a junior research fellow. Her Dad was looking around and asked if he can smoke. I took him to the smoking Lobby.
“So how is our Lab?”
“Ya. It’s good. Though not comparable to the labs in US, this is good.”
I restrained from stating again the elegance of my lab and smiled.
“So you are a Hindu.”
I wiped the remains of the Thilak that had managed to stay from the early morning temple visit and asked, “Now?”
“Yes. You are a Hindu. With or without the thilak.”
“I am not a Hindu. I don’t believe in any God. I feel anyone who shows acts of kindness and love are divine.”
“Don’t speak this atheist crap with me. You are in India not Russia to be an atheist. These communist have spoiled everything”
“Well actually atheism is more common in Japan, Sweden, France and Germany which are not communist. By the way, Communism is a economic phenomenon and administers all powers to the state and in turn to the people. It just disowns all practices that control people by force. And mostly importantly I can’t say I am either.”
“So you accept God.”
“I accept God as the love people show. I can’t trust that the showers of blessings from the heaven are any better than those I get from people who love me.”

We entered the cafeteria and the intern was speaking to a friend.
“All her life, she has got all that she wanted.”
I smiled as he nodded his head in disappointment and looked into my eyes.
“But now. She wants to be here, a place that can’t offer much to her. She had become emotional about this place. She hasn’t been very lucky with love. I hope she is not disappointed this time.”
I looked at him in surprise. Before I could think anything, I was dragged to stand up and given a kiss on my cheeks.
“Hey our first project offer was signed today. A big deal. We are going to do the interiors for the new Hidesign Showroom.” My love spoke as I smiled and said “Congrats”
The intern came back to our table and we all took our seats. The ladies were having a brief gossip session and she came back to lean on my shoulders.

“She is my life.” I introduced her to Intern’s dad.
He smiled and the turned to see the intern as she spoke.
“They are just too good Dad.”
As we smiled, her Dad seemed very disappointed and turned to daughter to say, “I thought you loved him.”
The intern’s smile vanished and she held her head down. She looked up after a moment with wet eyes and her Dad kept his hand on her shoulder.
“I thought no one will find out” she said.

I looked at her in surprise and couldn’t understand what just happened. As I was trying to analyzing the situation, she left my hand, lifted her head from my shoulder and sat upright in her chair. I turned see my love turning away from me, biting her lips, hiding her disappointment and holding her tears.

Success in love is… Part 23

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5  Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11,Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20, Part 21, Part 22

Life is not the smooth ride we dream about. Neither is it, the scary one. It takes all colors, makes you shed tears in joy at one moment and pee in your pants on another. I was backing her decision to move to Bangalore and motivating her to take up the challenging job. But I wasn’t sure what my life would be turning into once she comes here. Soon she had applied for her resignation and the probation period that she had to serve wasn’t any easy. She had to take Knowledge Transition sessions during the new joinee’s office hours and stretch her office hours to meet job requirements. It all meant that she was packed with work all day long and couldn’t call me for days.

I didn’t mind her not being able to call me. My lab was keeping me busy and I had to make bigger decisions. Everyone who knew about us was getting excited with the news and my Prof had a big smile when the intern spilled the beans after a critical meeting. My roomie wanted me to rent a house closer to his and spoke all good things about that. I smiled to mask off the internal conflicts. She on the other hand had shifted to my aunt’s house after my aunt persuaded her and literally kidnapped her. My cousin had mailed me regarding this and the mail which wasn’t longer than a Facebook status update, read “Mom succeeded in bringing sis home. Thank God  I am off the radar now.”

I was happy to know that she had moved to my aunt’s house. I won’t have to worry about her schedules and health. Aunt would do all the worrying and devise remedies for them. Sometimes it’s good when we have a large family. Your responsibilities will be shared and sometimes will totally be taken care of. I tried to concentrate more on my research as that is one area which haven’t showed any progress for so many days. Prof knew that expecting an overnight change or result is stupidity but he wasn’t happy about our errors which could be avoided. To err is human but when you play god for the microbes you lose that comfort.

One such day after a lot of work I received a call from my Aunt.
“Hi Aunt, How are you?”
“I am Fine. What’s wrong with you?”
“Why? I am fine.”
“Is anything wrong between you two?”
“No. We are fine. Is she ok?”

“Ya. She is fine. But you guys haven’t called to each other for months. Work pressure to an extent is acceptable. But can’t you even talk to her once a week.”

“It’s not like how it seems to be. We know each other quite well and know our pressures and limitations. Moreover you are there to take care of her, so I have lesser things to worry about.”

“A mother can show all the world’s love to her child but she still needs her spouse to ask once in a while if she is fine. That’s what every girl would want.”
I had an instant smile with the relationships being stated as mother and spouse.

“Yes. But we have faced a bigger separations and uncertainties. We are quite sure about ourselves and don’t need to prove it time and again.”

“Whatever dear. I have started to love her as my own and can’t see her in pain. I know its stress from the extended work hours but I also believe it’s you alone who can make that all right for her. Please talk to her whenever you can.”

“Is she near you now?”
“Nope. She hasn’t come yet. She should be tired when she comes. Try calling her tomorrow.”

I started to feel that my aunt has gone far too sentimental about this. But as per her orders I tried calling her for the next two days. The phone was either out of coverage or remained unanswered. Finally I will receive a message stating her inability to talk. I knew she was busy but so was I. We were slowly moving into a phase similar to the one we were in, before the acceptance of our family. Then, we couldn’t speak because of the family and now our passions were doing the job.

Few days rolled in the dry summer and the intern had to leave for her final review. Though her Dad was insisting her to pursue grad studies in US, she promised us that she will be back here. We had a small get-together on her last day in Campus. After an hour long chat where we discussed all the lighter moments we had together, I left in my roomie’s car to leave her at the airport. She went into a dull, “do not disturb me” mode as she sat next to me watching the campus till it was visible.

“Hey. You are a great person to be with.” I said to her as I parked the car in the Airport.
She smiled and turned away. “I was very happy here. It was much like a family.”
“Ya. Sure. You are going to come back here. Aren’t you?” I asked as we walked towards the Domestic Departures.

“I am not sure. Dad wants me to go to US of A. May be that will give him a sense of pride among his colleagues.”
“Why do you think so? May be he thought that the courses in America might provide you better exposure. May be he thinks it’s the best for you”
“Ya. He thinks Indian labs aren’t good enough. He thinks a US degree will make me get settled there.”

“Hmmm. Very few Indian labs have the American standards. But getting settled in US isn’t all that bad either, especially when you want to be a researcher. You won’t be having many distractions there. You can put your heart in what you do and research will have a great going.”

I said that and faced down to analyze if it has to do anything with my present situation. I couldn’t find any simple answer for this. Sometimes you speak of something you have always tried to avoid thinking about. When I was analyzing this, the intern came near, kept her hand on my shoulder and said with a single tear struck between her eye lids, “You don’t get the point at all. I want to be in India, in Bangalore, in our lab, with you. I need people who care about me to be around me. I need someone who will not judge me. I need you, who will treat me as an equal.”

She walked to her check in counter saying this and I stood there recalling what exactly she spoke now. I wasn’t sure of what I just heard from her. I stood there seeing her walk towards me after some time but my mind was somewhere else.
“We just made it. The flight will be leaving in sometime. I have to leave” she said with a wide smile which masked off the index of her mind from showing out its contents.
“Bye. Take care and keep in touch” I said and managed to smile.
“Hey. No need for these stereotype dialogues.” She gave a big hug and spoke to my ears, “I wish I had some more luck.”

She ran back with the same smiley mask and I left the airport with a confused mind. I didn’t have the time or peace of mind to analyze what she was going through. The lab routine was making me busier without the intern to share the work with. My roomie had a separate research and was totally immersed in it. Though we were working on the same lab, we hardly spoke with each other. Sometimes it’s a good aspect about guys, we know when to leave a person alone but that was also making us into workaholics. The atmosphere of the lab had changed without the lively lady.

Soon a month had rolled and the intern hadn’t returned. Suddenly I found a bizarre behavior in my research. The happenings were totally opposite to our understandings and I had to double check to confirm the new phenomenon. I was scared when my Prof started repeating the checks and making sure of the new development. But soon after her finished his round of checks, he called it a breakthrough in our research. Though it was completely unexpected and a new behavior, it showed great signs of progress in a new direction, out of the ordinary. With his approval that it was a great thing to happen to me, I had the time of delight in my research. I was going through something like the pursuit of happyness as in the American Constitution and rushed out of the lab to call her.

Before I could say anything, the intern said hello in the feeblest tone possible and it was easy to ascertain that she is in tears.
“My Dad wants to speak to you.” She said.
I didn’t say anything but my mind was revolving around all possibilities that her Dad would speak to me about. Exactly at the moment I received a message and it read “I have started packing my things. I will be there next to you in two days. Missing your hugs.”

There was a total blackout with excitement, uncertainty and a mixture of those two feelings were unleshing a three dimensional attack clashing with each other to conquer my thoughts.

Success in love is… Part 22

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5  Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11,Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20, Part 21
As the train disappeared from my sight; I stopped waving, folded my hands, and closed my eyes as the wind blew making me have a small oscillatory movement as an inverted pendulum. I know I was smiling wide and opened my eyes to see if anyone is noticing me. The intern stood there smiling with tears. She came near and hugged me.
“I just wish I would ever feel like you for someone.”
“You sure will. May be more.”
We walked to the car and this time the car moved slower than any old public transport vehicle. Illayaraja was taking me my own horizons and I was seeing her sitting crossed legs with her left hand on the window pane. The breeze would be blowing her hair around, making an art in air. The way she would smile at the small kid who was sitting opposite her. My mobile rang showing her photo exactly at that moment. I reached it fast, and fumbled as I took it. The Intern had a big smile and gave a small pat on my shoulder.
“Hello”
“Hi! You know what? This kid has the same name as you and he has promised to marry me as soon as he gets old.”
“Great! So I am just getting a seven year sentence not a Life imprisonment.”
“Who was talking about leaving you alone? You will have to do all the chores and earnings as I enjoy my life with him.”
“That hurts.”
“Ok. So where are you guys? Hope you are not driving.”
“Why? I am a good driver.”
“I can hear the breeze; the car has not stopped anywhere. So you won’t be driving.” She didn’t stop there for me confirm or affirm. “Tell her that I will call her tomorrow and continue with our plans.”
“What plans?”

“That’s none of your business. All you have to know is the train has started from Salem and I am not sure when cell phone towers will disappear. So I will leave you now. Try to get some sleep now, so that you can drive after sometime and she can sleep.”
“Ha! You are concerned about me or her.”
“You want me to answer that?” she asked with a smile.
I didn’t say anything. I cut the call as her cell became unreachable and leaned to have a small nap as instructed.
Now I didn’t want to imagine her playing with the kid in the coach. I am not going to part her for anyone. I smiled as soon as the thought crossed my mind and turned to see the intern who was humming to Raja’s tunes despite her inability to understand the language.

The next month rolled out making me the best time management guru. I had a lab that demands all my attention and a relationship that has it all. I traveled to Chennai on a weekend and met her sea, sky and friends. She was there to open my cousin’s home when I reached Chennai, make me get ready in a flash and join her in her numerous plans. We had dinner at her favorite restaurant and saw a romantic comedy at Sathyam Cinemas. We reached home at 1AM after a dream come true bike ride when she was almost eating my ears by whispering how much she loved the ride. She went to hug my aunt who opened the door for us and said that she is very tired. My aunt hugged her back and smiled at me. I stood there startled to see her making the aunt whom I haven’t dared to see eye to eye all my life out of respect, into a super cool companion. She turned back to smile and say her love before entering the bedroom. I went straight to kick my cousin who was sleeping on his desktop.
“What bro? I was meditating.”
“Meditating. Reserve those reasons for Mom.”
“Ok. How was the outing? I made these plans for Sis.”
“Hey leave that all. What about Mom? I was worried she will kick me when I entered home at this hour but she was cool.”
“Ha! You were with her.”
“What difference does that make?”
“My mom loves her.”
“What?”
“Yes. She is the new daughter of the house whom my Mom is pleading to stay here instead of the hostel.”
“How?”
“Guess Mom has got her long buried wish for a girl fulfilled and she is perfect match to mom.”
“That’s good.”
I smiled as he turned to his Facebook page which showed a dozen Chat boxes.

The next day was packed meeting her friends and spending time in the beach. We spent close to an hour without speaking a word watching the waves and the people. The visit got its completion when she leaned on my shoulder as the moon rose out of the sea, held my hand and shed a few silent tears on my shirt.

Life rolled on a high and the roller coaster ride came to big fall when my Project headed into a high critical state. Calls became very rare and those that happened were just status calls. Research was taking its toll on our relation as I couldn’t fulfill her righteous call of spending more time with her. The increased pressure also meant that I had to redo a few things due to errors. I started understanding the reason behind the many love marriages that happen inside the campus among fellow researchers. The feeling that life would have been so easy without commitments started occurring again and was subdued by the thought “what’s life without love?”
I started making myself as focused in the research as possible to make sure the projects are not affected by me, but errors occurred time and again. My dreams were starting to change from lawns and hugs to labs and books.

One such dream had taken me to works I had in the lab the following day and I woke up when I felt someone next to me. She was there sitting next me with her hand on my chest. I smiled and slept again. After a while I felt this isn’t dream and woke up again to see her eyes close with her lying on chest. I kept my hand on her hair and confirmed this isn't any dream.
“When did you come?”
“Just now.” She spoke with her eyes closed.
“How? Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Surprise. I wanted to feel your heart. You haven’t called me for the past 15days. I know you are busy, so I just wanted to come over and hug you.”
“Thanks. But I can’t leave the lab. The project is going on a critical stage.”
“I know. All I want is to remain like this for some more time.”
“I love you dear. I am sorry for not spending time with you.”
“Don’t worry. I have a few people to meet and I will keep myself busy till I meet you again.”
“Got friends everywhere?”
“Yes! All you friends are mine too. I am going to visit your ex-roommate’s house first. I have got so many gifts for their little one.”
I realized that I haven’t seen the little one for the past 1 month.

She left to meet my friend after some time and I headed to the lab to continue with the work. Works were so packed I couldn’t plan anything for her. She called me by afternoon and informed that she will come by 9PM and have dinner with me at the Cafeteria. I was relieved that she understands my position. But the clock struck 9 much sooner than it should have, according to my schedule. I called her to inform it’s going to take time for me to come and she said she is tired herself with the outings and will take rest in my room.

I had everything in place as fast as I could and headed to my room. The clock in the corridor struck 12 as I opened my room. She was standing there wide smile and hugged me close.
“It’s 4 years since I first met you.” she said as I felt my cheek getting wet.
“What?” I couldn’t imagine what she is referring to.
“We met in the Boomerang ice cream parlor this day 4 years back.”
“Wow! You are so good in remembering those days.”
“I will never forget that day”
I tried hard to remember what happened that day. All I could remember was her smile as she left the café.
“Where is my dinner?” I asked in her ears.
“Come in and find it yourself.”

I went in and saw a tidy room with my reading table made for dinner. The candle light showed her as pretty as she could be and I entered the room darn tired from work. We had dinner as she recited how good she is feeling at that moment to have dinner with me. My mind was revolving round the project that wasn’t going as planned and my inability to spend time with her when she has come all the way to see me. I was in guilt and answered her enthusiasm with cooked up smiles. We finished dinner faster than I thought it took. She cleaned the table and sat next to me on my bed.
“I am very happy now.” She said as she leaned on my shoulder and held my hand. I didn’t speak anything. I couldn’t. My mind was still among the failures in my lab. I took her hand in mine and saw the tiny burn mark in her finger. She stood up came in front took my face in her hand. I saw her unsure what she was up to as she said,“You look very tired. Sleep now. I have to see the intern and continue with our planning.”
She left to the Intern’s room and I laid down still in thoughts about the way my life is going to head.

She had plans to visit a friend the next day. I had to correct a few errors and do a process from scratch in lab. I promised to join her for dinner and leave her at the railway station. My mind was still with guilt as I entered the lab. Things were not going as planned as no research can be possible if you have your heart somewhere else. I stopped halfway prepared a checklist for the day’s activities and started my activities as per plan. Soon I was back to my normal pace and things started working my way. I finished all work by 7PM as my Professor walked in. He saw my checklist and had a smile as he proceeded to his room.

I left the lab and reached the restaurant in time. She was there with the intern, and another guy. She introduced me to him and he gave a firm handshake.
“Hey! He is going to start an Interior Designing firm next month and wants me to be a partner” she was excited.
“Wow! That’s great” I said but I wasn’t sure of what I spoke.
“Most importantly, it’s in Bangalore. But I have to think about it. This is a big leap for me.” she was speaking with her eyes fixed between me and the intern.
“You can easily manage all this. Just come here” the intern spoke my words as I smiled to mask my thoughts about the consequences.
I wasn’t prepared for this.

We left to the railway station in her friend’s car and she gave a big hug and a kiss before she got into her coach. She didn’t fail to whisper “You are everything to me dear. Don’t think of anything else.” I hugged close as she said that and replied, “I love you”
I started walking out as soon as the train started and the intern had a puzzled look as I passed her. I couldn’t understand why I had this thought then, “In life at one stage or the other, you have to prioritize your needs. You don’t always have a choice.”